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Retrouvaille Testimony
We just celebrated our 19th anniversary. Without Retrouvaille we would be starting our lives over alone instead of celebrating a renewed love in our marriage. We would like to share a little of our Retrouvaille experience with you.

Major miscommunications and the clash between an aggressive personality and a passive one had created the perfect storm. Years of frustration and rage led to 10 months of separation and a divorce that was well under way. We heard of Retrouvaille and wondered if there could possibly be a rainbow at the end of our storm. We decided to give Retrouvaille a chance. Neither of us wanted to go through the rest of our lives wondering if we had missed the lighthouse that could have guided us through the despair of being lost in what seemed to be endless waves.

We attended our Retrouvaille weekend filled with fear and doubt. Throughout the weekend we learned a lot of valuable communication tools, we rediscovered each other, and we met wonderful people who could understand our pain because their marriage had been on the rocks too. We left the weekend with a renewed hope, and a commitment to attend all the post sessions, which turned out to be very helpful. The Madison Area Retrouvaille Community is a lifeline for us. They are always there when we need to talk. We realize we will still encounter rough times in our marriage, but with God and Retrouvaille we now have a solid foundation.

We have put a lot of work into our marriage that was long overdue. With the help of Retrouvaille, we accepted God into our marriage and with Him we are able to do what we couldn't do on our own. (Two can accomplish more than twice as much as one, for the results can be much better. If one falls when he is alone, he's in trouble…And one standing alone can be defeated, but two can stand back to back and conquer; three is even better, for a triple braided cord is not easily broken. Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12)

We believe that the pain and misery we experienced in our marriage was not wasted by God. As others see the changes that have occurred in our marriage, we become examples of the possibilty that their anger can lead to forgiveness, their pain into joy, and their indifference or hatred into love. The hope that Retrouvaille offers is something we wish for you and your family. Don't let your pain and fear hold you back from the joy and love you can experience if you work on your marriage. With Retrouvaille and a strong commitment to each other, you and your spouse can have the meaningful marriage you have always dreamed of.

Karl & Kris Golz

More Than Just a Weekend Retreat
by Lynette Schiek-Rauwolf
If someone was to ask me what Retrouvaille was all about, I'd have to start by telling them about the powerful weekend retreat. I'd have to explain to them that they would be amongst about 25 other hurting couples, all with different stories, but all in the same boat of that lost feeling of complete hopelessness. This would give the couples a feeling of "were not alone". Although, don't get confused, because even though there are other couples in the room, this is not about all the other couples, it is only about their individual broken marriage. As the couple goes through the weekend, they are presented with other couples stories, from love to hurt, from happiness to hell, from togetherness to separation, from fantasy to nightmare, from trust to infidelity but thankfully desperation to hope. The weekend progresses as couple's share how Retrouvaille helped transform their marriages. How they left that weekend feeling like, "maybe we do have a chance!" and the hope is that this new troubling couple that walked in Friday night will leave feeling the same way.

But if someone was to ask me about Retrouvaille, I'd have to admit to them that it was so much more than a weekend retreat and that I couldn't even begin to sum it up. It gives continuity, support, and guidance for the next seven weeks. It continues to present more real life stories of hurting couples, more ideas, more tools, more advice, and more choices to make. It teaches that "Love is a decision." "Trust is a decision". "Forgiveness is a decision". We all have daily choice to make. We can give it all up and forever regret our decision or we can make all these other positive choices of love, forgiveness and trust, and our marriage will be blessed because of our choices.

But the weekend doesn't just stop after the 7 weeks either. There is a monthly refresher course. A time to get reminded of the important issues, such as values, affirming, love and so much more. It's a chance to have an excuse to have a monthly date with their spouse.

But again, it doesn't stop here. There are other areas of growing even more connected not only with their spouse, but now with the entire community. There are writing workshops. There is a formation retreat, which is like a follow up retreat to the original retreat. This will bring a sense of wanting to give back to this community that has helped their marriage so much.

But one of the greatest gifts, besides renewing your love for on another after going through the Retrouvaille journey is the gift of friendships and continuous love and support they will receive. They will feel safe, not judged and not alone. They will be encouraged and strengthened by a group of spiritually grounded people who all have a common goal of improving their marriage and spreading that to others. Mostly, they will be grateful for agreeing to walk through those big doors that Friday night to only realize later on the journey that this is so much more than a weekend retreat. This is God working to bring new hope and new life!

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